Whether you are a mother or father, chances are you have felt the pang of guilt when it comes to your children. We plan for our children, sometimes for years. Once they are here, we still have to work and take care of all the other aspects of our lives that were there before they came to be. Work has to happen, and we still need that time to keep the relationship with our partner going. With those other needs, comes the guilt of spending that time away from the children we love. Here are some ways to battle those feelings.
Childcare is the hardest choice to make if one parent cannot stay home with the little ones. The news doesn’t help this situation. Every week there are stories about terrible things happening in daycares. This is not a place you should be shopping for prices and trying to pay less. Remember, these people are going to be taking care of your child. You need to find the best for them. If you feel 100% comfortable with who is caring for your child, and know that they are being engaged and loved, it will be so much easier to leave them.
Those that have a parent or other family member caring for their child will have an easier time but try to facetime your child on your lunch or breaks. Seeing that they are happy and being able to hear about their day will make you feel more connected to them. If you use a daycare, you should ask about texting updates and pictures, and most will be happy to share. They don’t want to take too much time away from watching your child, but a quick snapshot of what they are doing that day will be a great way to stay involved.
Don’t Waste time
How many times do you come home from work physically and mentally exhausted? All we want to do is lay down and relax to some mindless TV or spend time checking out all the social media sites. This is a massive waste of time when you take into account that those few hours before bed is the only time you have with your kids. Try reading or having them read you a book. Playing a game will still allow you to rest but also have some bonding time. If everyone is exhausted, watch a family movie together instead of everyone going their separate ways.
Plan outings ahead of time so that the whole family has things to look forward to after a busy week. Not only will you get to make great memories and spend quality time, but it will help with the guilt. Children will appreciate any time with you, and it doesn’t have to be anything to elaborate. Making time for your family will reenergize you.
Guilt comes along with children when they are born. Give some of these suggestions a try and enjoy your family time!